Intoxication

I cry on my pillow with silent screams

I turn the music up

Hoping it makes your voices fade away.

I know they are in my head

As they haunt my solitude each night.

Your promises and apologies drown

In the lyrics and enchanting voice

That now engulfs my world.

Reality vanishes into clouds.

Of words that shape stories.

As I pick up my quill

Dip it in ink and begin to write,

The paper soaks in the lines.

I am not me anymore

This story was never mine to begin with.

They say you need to be intoxicated

To feel above it all.

Aloof. Dissociated.

But here I am, pushed and shoved

With my back to the wall.

Shouting that I can't care less

Afraid that nobody could hear me.

You all made me like this.

Pushed me over the edge

All of you, the sweet talkers, promise breakers

Who never stuck by when I needed you.

Today, I know no drug can harm me

No habit can compel me.

For Hurt is the most powerful intoxication of all.

And heartbroken I am, in the toxicity called life.

From The Quill