"I lost a reader to marriage."
I watched my friend laugh as I stared at her face nonchalantly.
"What do you mean... Lost a reader to marriage?" She asked after she had a good laugh. I shrugged, stirring the cold coffee I had ordered, with a cocoa sediment in it. "It means what I said." Her smile faded as she leaned in, cupping her face and asking me to explain. And so I did. Sighing as I leaned back in the comfortable armchair, I told her how it unfolded.
"We were in college when I started writing, and she started reading my work. We became friends." I thought for a while. "Well, kind of, if you can call gushing over fan fictions for hours that..." I paused carefully, eyeing her to see if she was judging me. She did not show anything that would give that away, so I sipped on the cold coffee with a soggy paper straw and continued.
"She used to read everything I wrote, often criticise the bad stuff and appreciate the good ones... She was one of the few I knew by name who would most definitely leave a review after reading anything."
"That's good." My friend took a mouthful of pasta that was turning cold between the conversation and the AC on full blast in the empty cafe.
"Yeah... Until she got married." I shrugged.
"How do people stop reading just because they are married?" She looked astonished. "I can't imagine."
"I thought the same. Perhaps she had grown out of my stories and gave me a lame excuse." I nodded. "She was not only my reader, but a very avid one. We discussed books, too."
"Then?" Now my friend was intrigued. "What changed your mind?"
"The fact that she completely changed." I shrugged again. "I'm not one to judge someone's life by social media. But..." I thought for a while to make it sound right. Like I had not stalked her after she ghosted me. "But then I see how she changed her dressing, her likes and dislikes." I probably sounded worried when my friend held my hand and said, "Hey, that's her choice, you know?" I nodded, unconvinced. "She loved books, she travelled, she was ambitious about what she did. And now, she is a stay-at-home wife who has stopped reading and communicating. She said ar shomoy paina."
"Did you ask her more?" My friend inquired.
"Yeah, after she invited me to her anniversary, I had a conversation with her about her lack of communication. "
" What did she say?"
"She said she has grown out of that life. Reality happened."
"Can be." She nodded.
"Yeah, but she added... My husband doesn't know about the groups, the fandom, or what I read. I don't want him to judge me, so I stopped." I thought about the exact words she had used. "I said, ' But it makes you happy, right?"
"What did she say?"
"She said it doesn't matter anymore. I have a different life now." I sighed. "I don't understand it. It's like she is someone else."
"I guess this is what marriage does to you." My friend contemplated. "It changes you."
"But I never lost a reader to marriage before."
" Perhaps you should start writing about marriages and divorces, and they will read about getting out of their toxic relationships." She joked.
I forced a smile because I had to. But deep inside, I was still very uneasy with it all.
“Do you remember my friend?” She said suddenly. “The childhood friend who was my neighbour?”
“Yes.” I nodded as she shook her head.
“Now that you say this, I was also thinking… she has also changed a lot.”
“How?” I took some fries from the plate kept between us as I asked.
“She doesn’t meet us often, and when she does, she always speaks of her in-laws and husband.” She smiled, amused. “She is also a very different person now.”
“We also speak of our parents.” I shrugged. “At least she is still talking to you.”
“I still feel like I lost a friend.” She nodded. “Do you realise we only have this problem with our female friends and not the men?” She looked a little wide-eyed as realisation dawned.
“That is what society does to women, I guess.” I smiled melancholically.
“And we do not even realise it.” She smiled back.
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